Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
