All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
