Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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