Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
