I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
