I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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