if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I can't put those talents on a resume
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize