I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
