I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
