i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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