i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
