Can i not drive my cunt home
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
