of course. lets lasso hookers.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
