I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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