Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
