he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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