my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
