gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
do herpes really smell.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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