I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
