This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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