my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
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