I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm both gender and math confused
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
