Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
