just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Randomize
