So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
