And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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