i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
