too bad you live with your parents still
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
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