I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
