Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Randomize
