You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
