Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
