it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
that is very illegal...i love you.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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