absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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