There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
