it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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