Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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