how can u be prego again
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
