Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I want to make a zoo with you.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
