one two three fourrrrnication!
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
This is the high leading the old right now
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
