i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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