The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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