You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
