was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
