Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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