I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
