is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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