I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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