Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
