I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Randomize
