omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
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